Blooming Through the Transition: Thriving in Menopause
With her eyes cast downcast towards her screen, a cup of coffee in hand and a pout on her lips, Ingeborg Beugel sits hunched on a couch. Just back from a Botox trip to Bangkok, she feels like she has wilted over fifty. Her documentary clearly shows that women in middle age can be caught off guard by menopause. It’s great that this subject, which receives little attention, is being brought to the forefront. However, I find the documentary ‘Blooming’ stigmatizing. Beugel states, “Women in menopause are depressed, irritable, unmanageable, and have no interest in sex.” Really???
Short on Sleep
Another critical note about this program is that hardly any attention is given to the sleepless nights that women in transition grapple with. Do you recognize that? Long nights staring at the ceiling, drenched in sweat, as Klaas Vaak makes his rounds. In the past, I had positively influenced hormones. I easily navigated the monthly disruptions, experiencing no mood swings and minimal discomfort—until I entered menopause. Fortunately, I’m not burdened by the symptoms that Ingeborg describes, but sleep is primarily what I lack. And many women and men of all ages struggle with this.
Keep Enjoying Life
What do you do when your nights are short or non-existent? Not necessarily due to worries, but simply because you can no longer fall asleep naturally? Or wake up wide-awake after just three hours of sleep? One day, I broached this subject at the breakfast table, and suddenly the stories flowed freely. To my surprise, most women around my age experience the same issue. As true workhorses, they manage to function well with their busy jobs. They just keep going. Throughout the day, however, alertness decreases and forgetfulness increases. Aware that life is fleeting, I strive to make every day a celebration and continue to enjoy life. How else could I under my circumstances?
Trying and Accepting
Yet, I must admit that at the beginning of my ‘meno-mood’ period, I was at my wits’ end because of the long, dark nights filled with disturbing thoughts. Through relaxation exercises, good breathing, and visualizing enjoyable situations, I’m managing to achieve at least a good night’s sleep. The fact that I lie next to a caring man helps. During the day, I’ve tried everything: meditating, homeopathic remedies, taking breaks, melatonin, sleep tea, walking, and swimming. It boosts vitality but doesn’t immediately promote sleep. I also engaged a coach/doctor to see if I needed to address any old wounds. But that wasn’t necessary. Now I’m making one last attempt with a cream that naturally supplements the female hormones estradiol and progesterone. Then I let go and accept… And, miraculously, I’ve been using this cream for three days now and am sleeping like a baby.
Encouragement in Transition
What reassures me is that it’s called ‘the transition’, so it will pass. A positive aspect of menopause is that this phase encourages you to make clear choices. It helps to sort the wheat from the chaff when it comes to people and thoughts. Surround yourself with what energizes you. It’s the time to let go of illusions. If you have a dream, now is the time to change course. While you still can. If during your life you’ve drifted away from who you essentially are, the transition towards aging helps bring you back to your essence.
How Do We Bloom?
My goal with this blog is not so much to start Sunday morning with a whiny and grumbling story, but more to check in with other women (in transition) or men dealing with insomnia, to see how they cope. Acknowledgment of the issue helps. And the fact that 40% of menopausal women are affected creates a connection. But how can we help each other with tips to navigate this phase as vitally as possible? The children are gone. There is more time for oneself. How can we bloom instead of wilt?
